We don't get to thank our dads too often. We don't get to pick flowers and construct special gifts. Why, Father's Day seems like an afterthought in many households. A father is a constant presence in a child's life that is bigger than life, that will continue to live on even if he is out of the picture.
Even though the last time I saw my father was when I was in my late twenties, I think of him and miss him everyday.I felt strong around him. I felt undefeated knowing he had my back, protected me from harm, supported me all the way. I could be and do anything with him around. I was the apple of his eye, the sweetness in his life, the joy of his days.
The love of a father is a very solid thing, forever strong, forever present.
Mine died the year my daughter was born. That year I gained and lost two beautiful souls. That year is etched in my heart forever. Oh how I wish he and I had reunited; how I wish he had met all of my family.
Take time to express your love for your father. Do it your way. Just do it!
27 comments:
I agree; My dad and I had a major disagreement when I was 19; I'm so glad we didn't let it last. We got past it and remained close. He died when I was 26. He never got to see me kids. I'm so glad we were on good terms when he died.
So eloquently put. Thank you. My dad and I were not close and he was never those things you spoke of. My grandfather on the other hand, was all those things you spoke about so eloquently. I miss him terribly and often wish he were here so I could go and talk with and share things with in today's world. Have a great weekend.
Beautiful post.
Beautiful post. And so true.
Fathers play an incredibly important role in our lives.
I have a more complex relationship with my Dad who is now age 94. I stay in contact and tell him of my love but I'm undecided on the importance of telling him about the harder to figure out and express feelings.
With complex relationships, especially with very elderly fathers, it's probably best to express love and let the rest go. My father could never comprehend the pain he caused his children, but told us that he loved us. And, in the end, when one is left with only memories perhaps that's what matters most. My father died when I was 35 and he was 66. After his death, I felt so much anger and bitterness fall away as I focused on what was good in our relationship.
thank you. as a father myself and a son. and i cant wait to see what mines plan is tomorrow...its a big secret and the boys are planning it...hmmm....
My dad had flaws by some standards but was perfect in my eyes. Daughters are so forgiving.
My dad was kind but remote, busy with his work as a military officer and away from home from time to time. He was easy. My mother was the difficult parent. The goal for everyone in our family was not to make her mad or not to make her cry.
When they retired, my mother wanted an ocean view. They bought a condo on the California coast, on the second floor. My father had emphysema by then. His greatest gift of love was walking up those stairs every day when he got hom.
It's amazing how the scars of childhood can haunt and shape a life. I hope my children will realize that we did the best we could as they are doing now with their children...making mistakes, but loving them and trying everyday to be better. And never forgetting to tell them how much we love them and how proud we are of them...My Dad was the greatest and I was so blessed to have him. He died when I was 23 and he was 56, but no regrets, anger or bad experiences..just a love that I hope we can share again in heaven.
My Dad passed away nearly three years ago, at the age of 98. I miss our conversations. Like you, I was fortunate to have a father who stood behind me, no matter what I did. He rarely said I love you, instead he said, "I'm proud of you". I wish he were here just one more day.
You are so right Rosaria.
I love my Dad & so fortunate to still have him with us. We are not close. Their are so many issues that we can't seem to peel away.
All I can do is love him as he is and pray for him.
I will get together with him this week and let him be rude or even mean. I will smile, chin up. Try to make him do the same. I will love him and try to give him a little happiness in that old hear of his.
Such a poignant post, Rosaria!! It touched my heart. Your father sounds like a wonderful man and to lose him at such a young age especially when having children had to be just heartbreaking.
I felt much that way when my mother died just before all the great-grandchildren were born. Even though I had her for much longer than you had your dad, I was so sad she didn't liv to see them because she dearly wanted to.
My own father was pretty difficult and non-loving all my life. when my mother died, he became very loving and sweet. It's never too late! I miss him now even though he lived only 4 years after mom. I think she taught him how to be a really good human and it was thrilling that he did that!
Lovely post! I never miss an opportunity to do something special for my Dad. He is the greatest and he is not only a wonderful father, but a wonderful friend, as well.
This was a thought provoking post. I was fortunate to have my father until he was in his 80's, but I still wish he would have been here longer. I think about all he missed out on. I miss him very much.
Darn, I read your post after I posted to my blog. If I had read yours first I would have written about my father for Father's Day. Guess I'll just have to do a random father post one of these days.
Beautiful post, you know my Dad passed away 2 years ago May 30 th. I miss him terribly and yet it seems like he is here every day. Happy Weekend.
Thank you Rosaria. As a father I hope to be worthy of the homage you render us.
not everyone has a good relationship with their dad. only when I was a child and then late in his life did I enjoy being around mine.
"How I wish we had reunited." That one line struck me, Rosaria. Regret can be one of the most painful things.
So glad you stopped by and commented on that lovely verse my daughter found to express how she felt about her father. I never had one on ones with my father, but he was a kind man and a steady provider. I hope to get close to him in the next life.
Ann Best, Memoir Author
I wish a father's presence was a constant thing in childrens' lives. I can't imagine a world where this is so. But it is good we recognize those who are!!
"A father is a constant presence in a child's life." I agree with "She Writes"; there are so many cases where this is not so. Which may account for the problems that a lot of our young men have.
But it's good to remember our fathers, if and when we can.
rosaria, it's beautiful and sad to think of the revolving souls in your life with both a death and birth occurring in one year's cycle.
i'm in greece and called my dad who lives in california. he wanted to talk a long time but my minutes were limited. i let them run down as long as i could, always remembering - at 88 and wheelchair bound, this may be the last time i hear his voice.
A beautiful post. I, too, miss my Dad every day.
A lovely tribute to your father.
I'm grateful to say that I did follow your advice. Before he died. And every time I tell one of his stories or glance at the several pictures of him I have framed around the house.
It's my good husband's fathering that I celebrate today, patting myself on the back for having finally chosen the right one.
That is the sweetest blog i've read! Your dad must be happier than ever.
As you can see, I am way behind in visiting...this was a lovely post. I have lost both my dad and my stepdad and miss talking with them and having them 'watch my back' too...
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