Writers and Artists Exchange-Port Orford, Or. 2013
For decades, on freeways and byways, driving miles and hours to and from work in the early and late hours of the day, I could only concentrate on two things, the road and the immediate problem facing me at the end of the trip.
Sometimes, the time that it took for me to drive, that distance, physical and emotional, between my problems and the rest of my life though long in miles and time, was enough to help me see that the bigger question was never asked; and the bigger decisions were never in my in-basket. I could only think of the most pressing tasks ahead, while the bigger things in life were deferred, day after day, months after months, decades after decades.
The bigger things in life moved at their own pace.
How and when did I define my life?
Did I contribute much to the direction my life took?
When did I have an opportunity to be bold and unafraid and state what was most important in my life?
By my count, five times stand as markers:
1. When I came to America
2. When I moved out to live on my own.
3.When I got married.
4.When we decided to quit our jobs and pursue higher education.
5. When we retired.
What do I wish I had done consciously during all those years of work?
1. Take sabbaticals. I could have planned three to six months travel studies in all the major parts of the world. Our lives would have been enriched immensely.
2. Take more vacations.
3. Write
4. Learn to play an instrument
5. Pursue hobbies and other activities on my own, not just what my family needed from me.
How about you? Were you free and conscious of your decisions?
