If my friends could see me now...

Darryl and Me, on my deck, on a sunny day last spring, when he suddenly showed up to visit me in Oregon.

Darryl and I worked together at Almondale Middle School, in the Antelope Valley of Los Angeles County, for a dozen years or so.  He retired after I did, and this visit of his brought back lots of memories.  He and I spent hours talking about our years and the changes we had seen together.

I've changed since Darryl knew me. Now, I take time to eat, to talk, to indulge in reveries. Back when he knew me, I never took a proper lunch break. It was lunch duty for me, time to walk around campus, supervise the five-hundred middle graders whether they sat and ate in the cafeteria, played soccer on the field, or roamed the halls.

I was not any thinner then, even with constant running around, and a forced diet of carrot sticks, yogurt and nuts to last me through the day. On my drive back home though, sixty plus miles down to the San Fernando Valley, I'd stop at In-N-Out joint and splurge on a #2 combo, cheeseburger, fries and coke, to relax, to fill my empty tank, and leave my cares behind.

Our work was demanding:  all our energies were focused and concentrated from the time we arrived in the morning to the time we left for home.  We ran to the restroom; we ran back to our rooms. No water-cooler conversations; not much idle talk of any type. Like  athletes  on a basketball court, we were focused and aware of everyone's place and function at all times.

Now that I'm retired, I'm making up for all the lunches I missed, all the water-cooler conversations I never had.  I go into reveries for hours, on this deck, watching the Ocean in the distance.

How to insure your child thrives and other tales of success...

This is an early picture of my garden at the beginning stage. This garden faced: weeds, exposure to winds,poor soil, lack of warmth.

Some things I could ameliorate; some things I had to accept.

I could build up the soil structure, add tarp to retain warmth, add fertilizing material to
encourage growth, add bio- variety to prevent insects from invading, and construct a wind barrier to minimize damage.

I had to accept that winds by the Ocean are often too harsh and too frequent, and my barrier would have to be of such force and durability to withstand hurricane force gusts even during the sunny months.

I had to accept that my soil is sand. Not just sandy, but all sand. Any plant material I add will take centuries to build up to an optimum level. I have to be patient and resourceful with what I plant, what I harvest to consume, what I compost for future soil build-up.

In educating our children, teachers basically make the same decisions. They begin by assessing the potential and needs of the youngsters. They look at the materials, time and resources available. They structure the classroom to keep time-on-task uninterrupted. They build structures to keep the winds of distraction at bay: rules, procedures, routines. They assign tasks and homework based on the capacity of the class to achieve pre-determined goals.

Much of the work in education is done by parents before the child arrives at school. You prepared the soil way in advance. You instilled love of learning as well as habits of mind. You taught rules and respect and fair play. The teacher is just planting this year's crop of concepts, skills and vocabulary.

If any amelioration needs to occur, you as a parent will be the first to notice and to point out. You will partner with the teacher and get the job done. Those barriers to keep the winds out are not built by one person. They are built by teams of dedicated workers supporting and respecting each other.

Your child will succeed not because the teacher likes him-though this element is most important- not because the homework is easy, or the materials are all available, but because he/she has become passionate about something beyond his/her capacity, something that is hard and important, something that makes him/her feel strong and important.

Both you and the teacher can take pride in his/her growth and achievements.

The harvest/results will not be visible for a long time. You are building a cathedral together.